Success

Back in my day as a "working" woman I was (as most of you know) the guidance counselor and special ed case manager at Revere Elementary School. This job brought me a lot of stress, a lot of joy, and in contact with a lot of colorful people.
On of these individuals, who will remain nameless, was a special education teacher who was pretty much the most entertaining and ridiculous coworker I have ever had the joy to work along side. In addition to being a special ed teacher, she also was a sheriff's deputy and worked as a prison guard.
Daily she would tell me stories of her past teaching experiences and often entertain me with snippets of her life in law enforcement. One of her best stories was about a strung out detainee who had extremely long fingernails. Apparently these fingernails were her pride and joy, however, during a violent altercation with my friend she used them as weapons and clawed at my friend's face, breaking the skin. After getting the inmate under control (by under control I think she meant sedated) my friend cleaned her scratches and then promptly went to the offender's cell and cut all of her nails down to the quick. Later, when the inmate came to, she cried and cried to my friend about how "someone" had cut off her best assets. My pal just nodded and smiled.

Why do I tell you all this? Well, many of you know that Addison has fostered quite the aversion to nail trimming. With the amount of milk she drinks and the rate at which she eats these days, it is necessary to cut her nails almost twice a week. That means that twice a week I am honored with a boneless, thrashing, hollering child, all due to personal hygiene.

However, today, when we got home from Target, Addison was passed out in the back seat snoring. Instead of easing her out of the car right away, I snuck inside, grabbed her nail clippers and went to work.
It was successful. She is no longer a long, dirty fingernailed babe. She might have twitched once or twice during the procedure, but she was none the wiser that it occurred.
I then snuck her into bed and she napped for another 75 minutes.

I couldn't help but feel a bit like my ever amusing friend, quietly and successfully winning the finger nail war.
Luckily, the only bars Addie awoke behind were her oh-so-comfy crib's.